Dear Friends,
You
may think I am having issues and struggling a lot because of this I have chosen
this topic and writing all these. But, it’s not true.
Before
telling the reason, I have to tell about my family.
I
am from a Lower Middle Class Joint family. My Father is having 2 Brothers &
5 Sisters and My Mother is having 5 Brothers & 4 Sisters. We are 40
children in my family both sides.
My
Father is basically from Vijayawada. My Grandfather passed away when I was 8
months old. By that time my father’s two sisters got married. Then my father
has become a father to all his siblings and migrated along with his entire family
to Guntur.
My
Father has played / still playing a nice role as father to his sisters & brother.
My
House used to fill with relatives always either side. So, I was attached with Grand
Parents, Uncles, Aunts and Siblings rather than my Parents. So, I started
observing the people around me. I observed happiness, sadness, egos, misunderstandings,
misusing the people, playing blame games, playing with others emotions, misbehaving
with the people, Dis-satisfactions of the people, More expectations of the people and so on.
I always think
- · WHAT IS LIFE?
- · WHY I BORN?
- · WHAT IS HAPPENING?
- · WHY THE SITUATIONS COMES AROUND?
- · WHO IS THE CREATOR OF OUR PROBLEMS?
- · WILL FATE PLAYS A ROLE OR NOT?
- · WHO IS GOD?
- · WHY GOD NOT SOLVE OUR PROBLEMS?
- · WHY PEOPLE WILL NOT ALLOW ME TO BE GOOD?
And
so on…………… But, I never get answers to my questions.
Till
my graduation, I am a book warm. I don’t have any other world except my family.
Even if I am not happy, I learned to be adjusted, I learned to be quite, I learned
to accept even though mistake is mine or not since I don’t like to argue, I learned
not to say No to anything as a middle class family member. People never taught
that that I am adjusting to all the situations and I need them in my life to lead
happy life. Instead they felt I am comfortable, I can’t do anything since I am
a girl and I don’t have any other options.
Like,
Cat starts roaring like a lion if we hurt it more, because of some situations, I
stared opening my mouth and opposing if I felt it’s wrong. Then on wards my real
life started. People around me started showing their original attitudes.
I
understood no love, no affection and no relations without money. Then I started
my life towards career in IT industry Even though I love teaching.
I
stayed in Hyderabad for 2 years and moved to Chennai for 1 year from there I moved
to Bangalore for 2 years and again I am back to Hyderabad. I am staying in PG since
the day I started my career in IT.
I
have seen/seeing so many persons in different age groups from different states,
different religions, and different cultures having different opinions,
different attitudes, different goals, different life styles, But, I am not able
to understand at least one person.
Still, I am in searching for answers to my questions of
LIFE.
Anuradha.Kalahasthi.
